So I'm trying to diversify my blog. I came up with this idea to include the female perspective, aka, asking chicks topical questions in order to improve the lives of fellow man. This is how it works: I send questions to a chick that I know, they answer anonymously however they want (including a free-style answer at the end where they can say whatever they'd like about anything), I post their answers, and people read them (most likely laughing -- with the guys secretly taking notes).
I will probably be sending out the same questions to 2-3 chicks over the span of one month so the readers can compare answers between the different ladies. Then I'll be sending out a new set of questions for the next month. It's fun, and interesting.
So here is the second neural synapse: Anonymous Chick #2.
1) What is the best gift a guy could get you?
Something that took more than five minutes to pick out without your woman (and/or your overbearing, critical mother...it's not her gift, it's mine!) having to tell you what to get. One thing that 99.9% of men don't understand is that you DEFINITELY WILL get paid back for your hard work. You get what you give! I understand that there are some ungrateful, bitchy women out there who will stop at nothing to nag you about every aspect of your life. Those you should dump. But, there are some women out there who are worth the time and effort.
2) Do you have any fashion advice for guys?
Really I just have one question: Does it take infinitely more energy to reach for a dress shirt than it does for a sweatshirt? If a woman is expected to look nice and be presentable, I'd like to know who created the double standard saying that men don't. A nice button down, tighter jeans around the a$$ and a nice pair of shoes can go very far. Boxers aren't sexy....neither are jeans that are pulled up to right under your man boobs.
3) Fashion advice for chicks?
The only time I want to see muffin top is in the morning with some coffee!!
4) What is the worst date that you've ever been on, and why?
I went to dinner with a guy who put absolutely no effort into making conversation. If you run out of things to say before you even get to the restaurant, text your friend and have them call you in the middle of dinner with an emergency. This situation needs an emergency getaway car.
5) What is the ideal first date?
Nice conversation with someone who at least pretends to be intelligent, trying out a new restaurant that neither of you have been to and then going for coffee afterward to continue talking.
6) What is the worst kind of kisser?
A nervous person!! Don't spit on me [editor's note: hahaha!], don't put your tongue in my mouth like a snake and don't make me reach up to your level and fall forward trying to kiss you. Don't make it awkward.
7) How many dates before sex? Less than one is totally acceptable.
Less than one never works. If you want a second date, you need to keep it in your pants and keep them guessing. Having a little self-respect is always a good thing.
8) Ever flash anyone in public?
No.
9) Does size matter?
It's not the size of the wave -- it's the motion in the ocean.
10) Freestyle. Go!
I'm honestly not really sure what I'm supposed to be doing here but let me say this: I have been through quite a few relationships now and I have yet to meet a mature man willing to take care of his woman and put her first. Maybe it's a product of this generation or something in the water, but being in a relationship shouldn't be a job!! I don't want to feel like I have to get paid for this!!!
Thanks Anonymous Chick # 2. Key takeaway: Don't spit on your girl.
Reader, yes you!: Please follow my blog by clicking "follow" in the column to the right. AND please comment!
E-mail me at goodbadbadass@gmail.com
and I will send you some questions!
Your anonymity is highly respected!